Exposing the Enemy in My Life

One of the most important things in our walk with the Lord is to be aware of how the devil works in our lives.

I see people of complete unbelief of God and satan that literally believe we've always just been alive through evolution or reincarnation (past lives lived). I see religious people and church goers completely unacknowledged that demons are real nor should be spoken about and that just because we proclaim Christian with our mouths does not mean we cannot have demons. There are four demonic strongholds even Christians can have, and they are unforgiveness, negative curse words, ungodly soul ties and generational curses that dwell within bloodlines of families, ancestral. Demons oppress (they make us do things by just giving thoughts in our head, it's when you feed into that temptation you know God probably doesn't like you doing. For example, and a big thing today, depression and porn, but it could even be anger or food). Demons don't possess like we see in all the horror movies; they proclaim they all walk up walls and or spin their head a complete 360 degrees. Lol. Most demons actually hide, and we don't even know that they are there. I have an old friend who was a believer before me who would write about how satan and his minion demon followers, were the cause of pretty much EVERYTHING negative in our lives individually and of the world overall. I never understood it, I believed people had free will, but that it meant they could do whatever they pleased as it is their life they're living, even if it meant to be an evil person, they could do that. That "karma" would always play out for them. I just didn't understand it in the Lord's way; we need to die to self and walk in the spirit, to pick up our cross DAILY and follow Jesus. (Luke 9:23) It's not our lives, it's His life when we surrender. When the Lord began showing me the truth in Him, He gave me two encounters with demons, one a dream and one a physical experience with a photo only Him and I understand (it was when I was ripping up old letters from my biological Father from when he was in prison and I was alone, listening to "Only Jesus' on YouTube, I took a screenshot which is the above photo). I've learned that Demons can attach to basically anything that harbors pain.

Once the Lord opened my eye gates, I started to receive the knowledge and the wisdom to understand the spiritual realm. The Lord started to reveal it during a very rough and vulnerable time for me. My fiancé and I were going through it a lot and I didn't understand why, we had a house, our family started, moved to TN from AZ for a new start to raise our family, TOGETHER. Then everything just started to get worse, year after year. We've lived here in TN going on five years now and I can honestly say it has felt SO MUCH LONGER than that because of the mental torment! Long story short, the Lord revealed to me things my fiancé was hiding. I was pregnant during most of this too, as I had my first daughter, had a year with her before getting pregnant with her sister, then just six months after our second daughter we got pregnant with our last baby and was blessed with a son. During all of this I had no idea why I felt the way I felt, I remember saying "I don't feel like myself" a lot, I cried almost every day, every time I tried to get back up, I felt I was knocked right back down. I felt alone. I felt unworthy. I felt so unhappy, and I honestly didn't want to live anymore. I literally could not find joy in ANYTHING and that made me have so much guilt and shame as a mother, as I love my babies! I barely wanted to clean my house, or to even shower, I wanted to just sleep the days away. I instantly wanted to push my fiancé away because I was hurt, my pride was on protect mode. I pushed my best friend away because she couldn't help me be happy either. I truly felt like I couldn't trust anybody! During all of this too I would have weird dreams, sometimes sexual ones and I always felt so OFF about it, but thought maybe that's how the mind works in the subconscious? I then learned that our dreams our connected to the spiritual realm and if we have any open doors or legal rights in the physical realm, demons can come into them and manipulate them. After everything I had been feeling and going through, I eventually ended up getting on antidepressants, I remember feeling numb more than anything and often didn't want to be taking them. I got off of them when I was pregnant with my last two pregnancies. I remember trying to get back on them after my second daughter was born but after only six months and getting pregnant again, I got off of them. I remember trying to take them during the beginning of my third pregnancy, but it made me feel SO SICK, I kept feeling like I was being told "you don't need them, it's all in your head", so I really just stuck to that through (clearly it was the Lord) even though at the time I didn't understand how to get out of the "funk" I was in, I tried to take everything into my own hands to try to "figure" it out. From there was when I really just started to call out, to confess I needed help. I didn't know if God was real or if he would hear me because I didn't even know how to pray and that honestly made me feel so awkward and ashamed for not knowing, but I did it anyway. Over a span of a year, it was 2020 and part of 2021 the Lord revealed to me in His timing so much about myself and the spiritual realm around me and how to break free from demons. He answered my prayers and started to bring me teachers and other like-minded brothers and sisters, as well as truly accepting Jesus as my Lord and Saviour, receiving deliverance, and being baptized with the Holy Spirit being able to speak in our heavenly prayer language. I have been able to forgive those who have hurt me and have been taught that we aren't wrestling against flesh blood, but against principalities, against rulers of the darkness of this world. (Ephesians 6:3), so those who have hurt me, it wasn't THEM, but satan, a demon, who was using them as his kingdom loves to cause drama and division. (Luke 11:17) I am currently healing from internal wounds, and this goes all the way back to childhood trauma and it's so wonderful to see the light out of the darkest tunnel! To know one day, they will just be scars. I finally feel I have a purpose, I have SO MUCH to LIVE for and it's for Jesus! Because he died on the cross so I, we, could be set free from the sin of this world and was then resurrected on the third day making it so the Holy Spirit could dwell inside of ALL of us today!! He is the one who reached His hand out and pulled me up out of my grave! I share this part of my testimony because it was the darkest time of my entire life personally and the first time in my life, I felt seen, I felt heard. Nobody even understands, I stayed pretty personal throughout a lot of it. Other than my fiancé and best friend/auntie who lives with us, and sadly my children (I am thankful they were so young) and my mother, only our Heavenly Father knows what I have overcome through encountering and seeing the evil of this world firsthand and then encountering the grace of the Lord Almighty! To be known and seen by our Heavenly Father, that alone makes me feel so secure! I've experienced such joy again, peace, TRUE LOVE, confidence/boldness, comfort in knowing I AM a Child of God! I've learned to genuinely not care about what anybody has to say or think about me, my walk or my family as anyone who is against us is therefore against our Lord and He's who they'll have to deal with on judgement day. I have such confidence to know now and to say that the Holy Spirit is with me, the Lord Almighty IS REAL and very much ALIVE! Although I went through some time living completely for satan without knowledge and went through a lot of pain, standing back up and facing fear with Jesus is the best thing I could have ever done and I should have sought Jesus sooner, but I know everything happens in His timing and I am so thankful either way. The Lord is there for all of us, if He can help me, my fiancé, He can help YOU! You are never alone!! Please understand we don't need to be perfect BEFORE we develop a relationship with Jesus, our Lord wants us as a "hot mess", He wants us when we are most vulnerable. To lean on Him in our time of need, to let Him in so He can help guide us through this spiritual warfare until His return. Satan's tried to take everything from me and by the grace of God I AM TAKING IT BACK IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME! Amen!

* (I thank you, Holy Spirit, for helping me share this all in a blog as you know I don't like sharing my business, but I will for you and the souls. I pray it blesses those that read it, in Jesus's name! I love you; I cherish, I praise you, Lord! Amen!) *